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in preparation for the coming term… 1. The beginning of the new school year is the perfect time to get a fresh start. Sever all ties with the people you foolishly you befriended last year.
2. It’s a bad idea to leave your homework till the last minute. Make sure the person who’s doing it knows that.
3. When there’s a scheduled event, whose title includes the words pep, booster or support, that’s the time to come down with mono.
4. If you must bring an entire tube cookie dough to school knock on, don’t store it in your gym locker. Not for more than a week anyway.
5. It’s just not smart to date a guy simply because he has the same name as your dog. Especially if your dog’s name is Fluffy.
6. Never join any clique that requires its members to have electrodes implanted in the backs of their necks.
7. You can improve your grades by asking questions in class. Start with "Are you grading this test on a curve?"
8. Some schools will let you leave early to get a volunteer job. Sign up in each and every organization around.
9. What’s the purpose of University Mall, Rob or even Quad? Maximize your allowable cuts.
10. Does your school have a motto? If not, try "WE LOVE LEARNING." |